Coach

The seats are all greasy
And the air is quite stale
There's no room for the legs
Of a six-foot tall male.
You're neighbor is hacking
up green globs of phlegm,
Babies are screaming
And the lights are too dim.
Cranky blond grannies
In short skirts and tights
Stand ready to set your
Wrong flying ways right-
They'll make you feel
Like you're quite the putz
After tipping your O.J.
With their over-sized butts.

[PS- When it comes to stewardesses, Nana is quite the exception- the Tinkerbell of American Airlines!]